HATE CHRONICLES: The Humanity Edition

Time flies and right along with it standards are flying out the window, faster than the times at Ridgemont High. Behavioral patterns that weren’t tolerable way back in the day are becoming the norm and judgement and ridicule are applied in all the wrong places. We live in a generation where it’s not out of the ordinary to be any of the following, and I hate it.

  1. Liars – We’re not talking white lies here; telling your wife she looks great in a dress when she’s feeling self- conscious about being fat is perfectly okay even if you aren’t perfectly honest. It doesn’t count as a lie. You can lie to spare someone’s feelings; you can lie to get out of work; you can even lie to cops when you’ve only had one beer and say you had none so as not to give them a reason to investigate your potential drunkenness – it’s not a big deal. It’s the other, much more core-shaking lying that truly concerns me… It comes so naturally to some people; it’s disgusting. I hate that feeling of disappointment after having found out that the person you thought was a decent one is actually full of shit. It’s very disconcerting to discover that the whole time you’ve known them, they’ve been feeding you lies that you’ve been gobbling up like a hungry kid on Thanksgiving. The whole concept makes me sad. When you first meet someone there’s this clean slate, virgin territory, blank canvas if you will… They start painting this canvas in front of you, making you believe that everything you see and hear is legit and then one day the real colors start to show, and it turns out they’re not colorful at all but in fact they’re black and grey, and all that is pure evil. But you’re optimistic; so you chalk it up to a mishap and move on, thinking that next time you’ll know better. But you won’t. You’ll inevitably stumble upon another one of these creatures, because your gullible, honest ass is just that fortunate.
  2. Entitled people– I can’t stand people that act like a certain type of action/behavior/response is owed to them for no reason whatsoever. Whether they have money or their parents have money, or neither they’re just naturally inclined to believe that whatever they have going on is most important. That kind of behavior is unacceptable in my book. Makes me want to smack the snot right out of their entitled little noses.
  3. Obnoxious people – Goes hand in hand with the entitled; mainly because they tend to be obnoxious. Nothing around them is ever satisfying because the blood that runs through their veins is glitter and how dare you roll your eyes at their pretentiousness. Where do these people come off thinking that their loud behavior trumps common decency?
  4. Disrespectful people – Either they weren’t raised right from the start or in spite of proper parenting, against all odds these people somehow sided with the nurture’s way of society as opposed to that of nurture’s way of what they were given from the start, and grew up to be disrespectful little shits. Sure, in most cases I believe the phrase ‘To earn respect, you must show respect’ to be very applicable; there are times however when respect should be given blindly. Disrespecting the elderly is huge; it makes me want to cry when I see some young skateboarder being rude to and old man simply walking on the sidewalk. Even if you have the right of way, shove your young pride in your ass along with the stick that’s already up there and kindly skate the fk on out of here. Your parents should not be proud.
  5. Petty people – Ugh. There are so many important things to you could use all that energy towards, why are you wasting it on the small shit that no one cares about? Honey, you’re only hurting yourself by doing that. No one else gives a damn. The only thing you’re doing is annoying others by your pettiness; why don’t you stop this silly nonsense and go be productive instead.
  6. Pretty people – You must understand that there is zero hatred in me towards the beautiful features in people. What I hate is the entitlement that rears its ugly head yet again, solely because they are pretty. These people tend to think that they don’t have to try in life; they can just get by on their looks. They seem to believe that they can get away with being shitty because they’re nice to look at and everything is or will eventually be forgiven. That’s not okay. At least be funny or something; do a trick – show your worth. Your looks will fade; then what? What are you going to have to show for yourself; pictures of your cheerleading and jock days? Get real.
  7. Lazy people– A little hypocrisy seeps through because I myself can be pretty goshdarn lazy. However… I’m only lazy on my own time and the only person that suffers from my laziness is I. It’s the work environment in which I can’t stand lazy people. Work is work. I’m passionate about my line of work so it seriously drives me nuts when you get those f**kheads coming through and doing only the bare minimum or even below that. If you’re gonna do that; go work in a Walmart, where no one gives a s*it in a first place and your lack of diligence and effort isn’t standing in the way of others’ livelihood, not to mention sanity. Oh, the sanity! Sometimes I feel like I have none. And every time I wine about the ridiculousness that comes along with my field, people are like “Relax, it’s just a job”. Well that’s the thing. To me it’s not just a job, it’s my life. That actually makes me ponder… If I hate lazy people at work, and work is life, why do I allow myself to be lazy outside of work? I shall have to examine this later…
  8. People that take my shit without asking– This is why I hate having girl roommates. Guys will leave dirty dishes in the sink but at least they won’t take your earrings without asking, only to lose one of them in a club and never tell you…
  9. When people are unfair– I’m a huge advocate of fairness; it constantly bites me in the ass though because life isn’t exactly fair. Whether it’s at work or at home, I always find myself in situations where I’m constantly being reprimanded for things that other people walk away with clean as a whistle. If a punishment is going to be distributed, it should be done in a fair accordance. I hate the fact that others get to get away with things while I take the heat. And I can’t even say anything! Why? Because that would be petty.
  10. People misusing hashtags – This may be a silly thing to “hate” but nonetheless it’s incredibly annoying to stumble upon images that have nothing to do with the nature of said hashtag underneath it. Hashtags are designed as grouping agents. By hashtagging your image, you’re inviting the world with similar happenings to share your mutual experiences and partake in the awesomeness that which is humanity, together… By putting #table in the description under a picture of a friggin #elephant, you’re screwing the system. A person is on a mission browsing for tables and here you come along with your elephant; what, you don’t get enough attention from the people that hang tapestry on their walls, you desperately have to tackle the furniture world of Instagram too?
  11. Close minded people– These are the classic ‘I’ve always done it this way’ and the ‘If it’s not broken, don’t fix it’ people. These are the people that are so set in their ways that it’s impossible to lead their feeble little minds down a curvy path of a dark unfamiliar forest; they refuse to go there even if you proposition the possibility of eternal paradise. They would much rather stay in their comfort zone where they’ve been coddled their entire life. It’s partially because they’re lazy; partially because they’re stubborn. Either way the outcome is good for neither them nor me, the bystander. I’m immediately affected by these people’s inability to see past their straight line, because more often than not these people have immediate authority over me.
  12. Telemarketers – They don’t bother me now that much as I don’t have a land line and am not listed in the yellow book. I hate them because I once was one and I hated every minute of it more than I hated them before I ever became one of them. No matter how good a salesman you are (I’m not) your job is the lowest of the low on the cold calling scumbag level of all jobs. You are the shit-swallowing of all the bottom feeder of the fish. You are that which is glued together due to time and toxicity, at the bottom of the garbage can. You are what your parents prayed you wouldn’t become back when they first thought you had a chance. My, my, what a major disappointment you are, you senseless telemarketer you. Have you no shame?
  13. Aggressive drivers– Why so angry? Do you think you’re going to get to your destination faster by screaming and cursing behind your wheel? You’re already sitting in traffic – there’s nothing you can do about it. Actively trying to dart in and out of lane isn’t going to change your position in line that much. All you’re doing is aggravating yourself and causing a potential accident by hastily entering a spot on the freeway much faster than the speed limit allows when some old guy or an Asian lady is trying to calmly merge into, not anticipating that there is a crazy person on the loose. You are the crazy person. It doesn’t make you a good driver if you know how to weave in and out of lanes; it makes you a reckless one. As much as I hate this phrase when it’s directed at me, I will take a risk and say it to all the aggressive drivers out there – calm way the hell down.
  14. Poor grammar– This is coming from a Russian, okay? I’m still learning the English language. I say things that don’t make sense all the time. However, I get corrected, I learn and move on knowing more than I did in the beginning of that day. What I can’t stand is people consistently making the same stupid mistakes. It’s ‘I couldn’t care less’, not ‘I could care less’. If you could care less, it implies that you actually care. That one just happens to be at the top of my list of things that aren’t properly spelled, along with to, too and two; your and you’re; there and their – you know the ones; they’re all over the internet, bashing those who use them improperly. I at least have an excuse; I wasn’t born in this country. You would never catch a Russian misspelling something in Russia; it just doesn’t happen. So why are so many Americans butchering their own language? It’s not okay. I recently learned that the phrase ‘You’ve got another thing coming’ is actually ‘You’ve got another think coming’. Apparently it basically means ‘Whatever you’re thinking is wrong, so if that’s the way you’re thinking you better think again’ – ‘ You’ve got another think coming’. That’s fascinating. You best believe I will never make that mistake again. Can you say that about yourself next time you say expresso instead of espresso?

So much negativity in this post; no wonder I’m so cynical. How can one stay positive when it’s a never-ending streak of continuously giving people chances just to get gang banged by all these disrespectful, obnoxious, lying dicks over and over again?

Kegel exercises for the mind; that’s how.


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