GAVIN McINNES – Best podcaster yet

Gavin McInnes is rapidly becoming one of my favorite people in the world. Every podcast I listen to and every video with him I watch, I grow fonder of him. I can’t believe how on point he is with every single statement he makes. Even when I ultimately disagree with what he’s saying, I still somehow feel nothing but respect for this guy. He has no limits; he’s basically done it all, and if he hasn’t, it’s only a matter of time before he gets to it.

I mean the dude shoved a butt plug in his ass for the sake of research. And it wasn’t the kind of research that had the benefit of tallying up how many dying babies could be saved after the fact or some shit; it was merely for the purpose of making fun of Hillary. This guy sacrificed the comfort of his butt hole, on camera, just to demonstrate that even when he’s at his most vulnerable he’s still more graceful than our potential (shrug) female president. Brilliant.

It’s not just Hillary; he doesn’t seem to be fond of women in general unless they’re begging for his supposedly magnificent cock, the ways of which he elaborates on in a very tactless and hilarious manner. Aside from that he constantly berates women, talking about how dumb they/we are. I’m a woman and I personally find his analyzations hysterical; some more than others of course. For example, I’ve never heard that having bangs is a stereotypical hairstyle of a feminist. I have bags, and I’m as far away from being a feminist as a feminist is from a vaginal orgasm.

Although I must say, I’m not convinced that his general opinion of women is as negative as he makes it out to be. For one, he’s married. Sure, that doesn’t say much, especially when he says things like “You only get married because you’re tired”, but at the end of the day, I don’t think the wife would stick around if he treated women as poorly as he advocates. He probably comes home, shifts the funny mask a little bit to the left cause let’s face it, I don’t think the funny mask ever comes off entirely; spends quality time with the family, collects some more material that can be twisted into misogynistic humor and then goes out the next day with the funny mask fully on, delivering that very material in the most classless and entertaining of ways. The things is, he’s probably madly in love with his wife and kids; but who wants to listen to that sappy shit? Everything ‘funny’ is derived from a place that’s somewhat “mean” and “offensive”, so naturally he tackles that market and boy does he do it well – Bravo!

My seemingly flawless hypothesis does have a couple of plot holes in it though… The mere fact that he broadcasts how his constant drunkenness causes him to piss the bed, which at times is followed by him watching his children wrap themselves with his piss soaked towels alone is an indicator of either the fact that his wife doesn’t watch or listen to his show at all, or the fact that she doesn’t give a fuck as long as he brings home the bacon. Then again, he does claim to be in the dog house an awful lot… Maybe she’s just one of those cool chicks that gets over things really fast. Either way, it’s not like he’s unaware of the fact that his drinking/ bed wetting is a problem; he even considers quitting or at least lightening up on it for a bit. The funniest, most ridiculous thing as of yet that he’s done about it naturally involves wrapping a diaper around his dick and balls before reaching for a bottle of bourbon and eventually passing out, only to wake up in the middle of the night and put the very same diaper that he was wearing onto his crying child. Oh don’t cringe; those things are super absorbent. There’s enough room for pee of both an adult and a child. Although he swears that it was dry when he made the transfer, but what does he know; it was dark and he was probably still drunk.

Playing psychologist is fun and all but at the end of the day, no one knows what goes on off-camera but Gavin himself, so instead of trying to decipher his personal life, I’m just going to sit back and enjoy listening to his shenanigans. Quite frankly I couldn’t give less of a shit about what his true feelings towards women are or whom he’s going to vote for in the election as long as he keeps putting out the excellent content that he’s been.

Proud of your boy.


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